When a lifetime of campaigning for the Nobel Peace Prize meets a laureate’s generous sense of humour, surely a little more applause can bring world peace a step closer.
Navi Pillay’s offer to share her Nobel Peace Prize with Donald Trump, should the applause continue a little longer, was undoubtedly the joke of the season. But I wonder whether she appreciates the enormity of the sacrifice she is contemplating.
After all, Trump is an honourable man. A man of peace. A man who, much like our very own Andhra evangelist K.A. Paul, claims to have stopped several wars across the world.
Poor Trump! Year after year, Nobel season has come and gone, leaving him empty-handed despite his tireless efforts to convince the world that nobody deserves the Peace Prize more than he does.
Imagine the disappointment of a man who believes he has single-handedly brought peace to the planet, only to discover that the Nobel Committee has other ideas. Repeatedly.
A little more applause, please
One can only admire his perseverance. Most mortals would have given up after a couple of rejections. Not Trump. He returns every year, making his case with the determination of a litigant who is also his own judge, jury and cheering squad.
And now, just when all hope seems lost, along comes former UN rights chief Navi Pillay with a tantalising proposition: ‘If you clap a little bit more I may share this prize with Trump.’
A trophy for self-promotion
Had I been at Nuremberg’s Palace of Justice when Pillay made that remark, I would have clapped the loudest, until my palms were sore. Not merely out of admiration for the lady, but for the sake of Trump.
Surely, with sufficient applause, Pillay might have been persuaded to share her prize with the man who has spent years campaigning for a prize that the rest of the world seems so reluctant to award him.
And what a noble gesture it would be! Pillay could retain the laurels for her lifelong work in international law, while Trump could take home the trophy for his lifelong work in international self-promotion.
A citation worthy of the occasion
The citation could read: ‘For outstanding contributions to the cause of peace, including the prevention of wars, the announcement of their prevention, and the repeated insistence that they have been prevented.’
Of course, there remains one small complication. The Nobel Peace Prize is awarded for achievements in peace, not for the intensity with which one desires it.
A new category for Oslo, perhaps
After all, peace is about bringing people together. What better way to promote it than to unite a deserving laureate with a deserving aspirant, a distinguished jurist with a self-declared global peacemaker?
So, Madam Pillay, please consider my applause officially recorded. If you need an encore, I am available.
And Mr Trump, do not lose heart. Your Nobel may yet arrive – not necessarily from Oslo, but perhaps from a generous laureate with a sense of humour.
In the meantime, may I suggest a new category for next year? The Nobel Peace Prize for Outstanding Persistence in Seeking the Nobel Peace Prize.
I can think of one candidate who would accept it without hesitation – and probably demand that it be presented to him personally, on live television, before an audience instructed to stand and applaud.
