The sweetness of siblinghood, changing times, and the greater responsibility associated with Raksha Bandhan.
Raksha Bandhan is a festival of Indian culture that is the most intimate one. It’s not just a day for tying Rakhi around a brother’s wrist and giving him some sweets; it’s a day of love, trust, memories and lifelong friendship between siblings. The Rakhi is just a single thread inside of which lie many feelings, from childhood times, to love in the here and now, to hopes for a better future. Tying of a Rakhi by a sister is not only a request for protection, but also a symbol of their bond. She is praying for his happiness, well-being, health, and success in silence. The brother in turn takes over the duty of supporting his sister at life’s various stages.
Brother/Sister relationships are sometimes characterized by sibling rivalry early on and then progress to one of the most intimate emotional connections in life. When it comes to children, it’s about the little moments of arguing over toys, sweets, or anything else that eventually turn into treasured memories. As siblings grow older, they get busy with their studies, job search, marriage and family. Others move to other cities, or other countries. While there may be more distance between the two, there may also be more emotional connection as well. Raksha Bandhan is to make it easier to remember and re-discover that connection.
The significance of Raksha Bandhan should be understood in a wider perspective too in the ever-changing social context today. The family is becoming smaller and spread across the locality has taken the place of joint families. Brothers and sisters can be separated by a long distance and might not have any chance to meet during the course of the year. In such times the Rakhi is not just a thread that reaches the wrist; it is an emotional thread that traverses’ distances. The sentiment with the Rakhi is the same whether it is received by mail or the celebration is done via a video call—the prayer for the well-being and happiness of a loved one.
But with change, there must be rethinking of what is meant by a brother’s responsibility towards his sister. Protection doesn’t simply mean to stand by her side in an emergency. This is also about valuing her dignity, freedom, choices, and rights. To say that a sister’s freedom has to be limited in order to be protected is not protection; it is control. A good brother is one who believes in his sister’s capabilities; he encourages her to study, take care of her career, carry out her ambitions and make her own decisions about her life.
Females of today are proving their capabilities in fields of education, science, administration, politics, etc., armed services, sports, business, arts and in all other fields. One of the things a brother can give his sister in this world is confidence. This is what he should do, stand on him/her shoulders and recognize her accomplishments as her own and her family’s.
It’s not just about tying a Rakhi and wishing for long life to the brother; the responsibility of a sister should not be restricted to that. The brother-sister relationship is one of caring, supporting and sensitivity. A sister can be a brother’s emotional support if he has a problem, and a brother can be a sister’s when she has a problem. Emotional aid may sometimes be more beneficial than monetary help in the tribulations of life. For someone, “I am here for you” is enough to fill someone with courage to deal with the toughest of times.
Raksha Bandhan is also a chance to take stock of the evolution of family communication. Technology has shrunk distances between people, yet at times it has made a distance between the people who are seated around the same table. Families are able to stay in touch via the phone and social media but not much time is spent in meaningful conversation. Relationships cannot be maintained by messages, pictures and emojis, festivals remind us. They need time, listening, understanding and sharing in their joys and sorrows.
The Rakhi thread also has a special emotional value for persons who have lost their brothers or sisters. For some it is a day of laughter and celebration, for some it is a day of memories, silent tears. Sisters whose brothers are serving far from home, including those on the borders of the nation, have a special mix of feelings of affection and patriotism. Similarly, brothers and sisters who are separated by circumstances may not meet, but the Rakhi tells them not to worry as they don’t need to forget their love for one another.
Sadly, consumerism is becoming more dominant in festivals these days as well. The value of Rakhi, the gifts exchanged and the rivalry to celebrate can often be more of an obstacle than a blessing. Love is a beautiful thing, it can be expressed in the most elegant ways through gifts, but the worth of a relationship is not in the gift. The respect, trust, time and emotional support of her brother is more valuable to her than an expensive gift. Similarly, a sister’s love and support in times of trouble is invaluable to a brother.
It is important that an atmosphere is established all year long where each girl is safe, independent and respected. Women’s respect should be started in the family which slowly turns into a social value. Children need to learn the importance of equality, empathy, consent and respect from an early age as core values of healthy relationships.
Raksha Bandhan, in this way, isn’t simply a day upon which you tie a thread on your brother’s wrist. It’s a chance to comprehend and meet relationship requirements. It helps us to understand that love isn’t a state of possession, but of trust; protection isn’t a state of control, but a state of respect; and a relationship isn’t held together by blood, but by empathy, understanding, and mutual support.
But a Rakhi is more than just a thread tied around a wrist, right? It brings childhood playfulness, Mumma’s morals, sister’s prayer, brother’s promise and the family’s hopes for happiness. This is why this little thread becomes thousands of miles insignificant. In the absence of love and trust, the Rakhi is not just a string around the wrist; it’s a thread that has the potential to tie two hearts together.
