In Indian society, marriage isn’t just a relationship between two individuals; it has always been considered a sacred institution linked to family, society, and culture. Marriage has long been considered a lifelong companionship, a mutual support through joys and sorrows, and a cornerstone of social stability. However, in recent years, the image of this institution has rapidly changed. Today, marriage is becoming less about a commitment to togetherness and more about social display. As a result, relationships are weakening, and cases of divorce or separation are steadily increasing.
It’s a harsh reality today that people are spending 20-25 lakh rupees or even more on weddings, but there’s no guarantee that those marriages will last more than a few months or even days. Statistics show that approximately 40 to 50 percent of marriages in urban areas are on the verge of breaking up or have already broken down. This isn’t just a personal failure, but a sign of a deeper social problem, one that could be costly if ignored.
The biggest reason for this crisis is the culture of ostentation. Marriage is no longer a personal decision, but a grand event, where hotels, destination weddings, expensive clothes, photoshoots, and social media posts have become paramount. People spend more time thinking about what guests will say, how impressed relatives will be, and how the photos will look on Instagram. But they don’t take the time to consider the thoughts, temperament, tolerance, and outlook on life of the person they will spend their entire life with.
Social media has exacerbated this problem. Everyone is trying to make themselves look better, hiding their true self. This “perfect image” created before marriage gradually crumbles after marriage, and when the truth comes out, disappointment, conflict, and dissatisfaction arise. People realize that the person they married is not exactly what they imagined.
Another major reason is a lack of patience and an excess of ego. Nowadays, people’s patience levels have plummeted to almost zero, while egos have skyrocketed to a hundred. Relationships are strained over trivial matters. Instead of communicating, explaining, and understanding, people quickly conclude that the relationship won’t work. Thinking, “Why should I compromise?” and “My happiness comes first” are eroding relationships.
In the past, problems in relationships often arose, but efforts were made to resolve them. Today, when problems arise, people consider separation the easiest solution. Instead of nurturing relationships, the mindset of changing them is growing. This consumerist mindset is no longer limited to objects but has now permeated relationships as well.
Another important reason is the breakdown of the joint family system and the rise of nuclear families. In joint families, children learned tolerance, sacrifice, responsibility, and the art of maintaining relationships from childhood by observing their elders. Disagreements did exist, but they were resolved through dialogue and understanding. Today, children growing up in nuclear families receive very little of this practical training.
This doesn’t mean that nuclear families are wrong, but they indeed offer a limited experience of collective living. As a result, when young people face new relationships and new responsibilities after marriage, they are mentally unprepared. Even minor disagreements become unbearable.
Additionally, economic independence and changing social roles are also impacting relationships. Women today are increasingly self-reliant, which is a positive change, but it has also led to a growing conflict of expectations. Both parties are increasingly aware of their respective freedoms and rights, which is right. However, when this happens without mutual respect and communication, conflict can arise. Equality should mean cooperation, not competition.
Another worrying aspect is that today’s generation is afraid to commit to a single decision for long. Whether it’s career, city, or relationship, the “if only I could find a better option” mindset prevails everywhere. This mindset is making even a lasting relationship like marriage unstable. When the constant feeling that something better is possible is present, satisfaction and stability in any relationship are impossible.
Due to all these reasons, there is a growing fear that in the future, people will distance themselves from the institution of marriage. Some people have already begun to view marriage as a burden or a risk. If this trend continues, its impact will not only be limited to personal life but will also impact the social structure. If the family, the smallest unit of society, weakens, the stability of society will also be at risk.
However, it would be wrong to say that there is no solution to the problem. The real problem lies not in marriage itself, but in our attitudes and priorities toward marriage. We need to minimize ostentation and extravagance and prioritize mutual understanding, communication, and emotional connection. It’s crucial to devote time to each other before marriage, have open conversations, and have clear expectations.
At the same time, society and families must understand that marriage is not just about rituals and traditions, but rather about the process of spiritually bonding two individuals. Young people need to be taught that relationships aren’t perfect; they are strengthened through patience, respect, and understanding.
Ultimately, this is a time for introspection. If we continue to prioritize appearances, ego, and haste, relationships will become mere temporary compromises for generations to come. But if we change our thinking in time, the institution of marriage can once again be transformed into a foundation of trust, stability, and respect. The future of society depends on this balance.
