Another September, another United Nations General Assembly (UNGA) session. Once again, the world’s leaders descended on New York to solve global problems—by talking about them endlessly. If nothing else, this annual jamboree is proof that while technology has advanced, politics remains stuck in a perpetual Groundhog Day.
This year, though, the farce had extra seasoning. Volatility was the order of the day, with statements ranging from the tragic to the comic. Bhutan’s President, of all people, spoke the plainest truth: the UN is outdated and desperately needs reform. He rightly flagged that expanding permanent membership of the Security Council is long overdue, especially for countries like India and Japan. It is almost laughable that two of the world’s largest economies and major contributors to peacekeeping remain locked out, while relics of 1945 hold the keys to global power.
Even more laughable? The United States President—yes, Donald Trump, in his encore act on the world stage—took the microphone. One expected fireworks and he did not disappoint. Between blaming the UN for failing to end wars (true, though hardly a revelation) and complaining about his teleprompter malfunctioning, he somehow found time to narrate his wife’s miraculous escape from an unreliable UN elevator. The world’s premier multilateral forum, reduced to a Yelp review of facilities management. Somewhere, Dag Hammarskjöld must be turning in his grave.
And then, the lies. Oh, the lies. Trump and Pakistan’s Prime Minister Shehbaz Sharif appeared to be in competitive storytelling mode. Both claimed, with poker faces, that India had lost fighter jets in a recent skirmish. One almost expected them to conjure flying saucers next. Sharif went further, profusely thanking Trump for “saving the region from war” through timely intervention. That, in plain words, was a white lie. If Washington had really been the guardian angel Sharif imagines, South Asia would have been a utopia by now. Instead, Pakistan continues to export terrorism and plead victimhood in equal measure.
India, however, wasn’t in the mood to play nice. Its permanent representative— Petal Gehlot, embodying the rising confidence of “nari shakti”—called out Sharif’s nonsense point-blank. She reminded the world of India’s resilience, firmly reiterating that Operation Sindoor remains ongoing, and no amount of Pakistani propaganda can rewrite facts. When Indian forces flattened terror camps across the border, it was Pakistani generals themselves who carried coffins and mourned the dead. That, she noted, was not a Bollywood script but reality witnessed by the world.
But India didn’t stop at Pakistan. The firebrand envoy also tore into Washington’s hypocrisy on terrorism. With uncharacteristic bluntness, she recalled how Pakistan had sheltered the ISIS chief on its soil, only for U.S. Marines to storm in and kill him. A timely reminder: the so-called “frontline ally” in the war on terror has been a terrorist hotel, and America’s selective blindness remains the biggest enabler.
And if that wasn’t absurd enough, Bangladesh’s Nobel laureate-turned-political puppet, Muhammad Yunus, popped up with his own bright idea: expand SAARC. Yes, the same SAARC that has been comatose for a decade, thanks to Pakistan’s antics. Recommending its revival at the UNGA is like proposing CPR for a corpse that died long ago.
All of this raises the larger, grimmer question: what exactly is the UN doing? The Bhutan President’s demand for reform struck a chord precisely because the UN has failed to evolve. Born in 1945 to prevent “the scourge of war,” it has watched every major conflict since—from Korea to Ukraine, Gaza to Sudan—unfold under its nose. Its Security Council is paralyzed by veto politics, and its General Assembly has become a theater for leaders to perform for domestic audiences. The only thing the UN excels at these days is issuing strongly worded statements and collecting rent from NGOs.
Reform is not just desirable; it is existential. If the UN cannot adapt to the realities of the 21st century, it will wither into irrelevance, much like the League of Nations it replaced. Permanent seats for India and Japan are not favors but necessities if global governance is to reflect economic and demographic realities. Likewise, accountability must be introduced for serial offenders—nations like Pakistan that habitually misuse international forums to spread lies should be sanctioned, not indulged.
Until then, the annual UNGA remains less a council of nations than a circus tent: Bhutan as the earnest schoolteacher, Trump as the stand-up comic, Sharif as the conjurer of lies, and India as the angry truth-teller. The problem is, the world’s most pressing crises—climate change, terrorism, war, famine—require solutions, not performances.
For now, the UNGA keeps proving Mark Twain right: “Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.” Replace “Congress” with “UNGA,” and the satire writes itself.
