The election season is the time when politicians, with folded hands, declare themselves as servants of the people. They roam the streets, promise the moon, and act as though they are but mere mortals at our mercy.
Fast forward a few months, and the same humble servants transform into rulers of an empire. Their perks exceed those of top bureaucrats and corporate CEOs. Lavish salaries? Check. Free housing, travel, and allowances? Check. The ability to doze off in the middle of Assembly proceedings without any HR consequences? Double check.
But now, Karnataka’s elected representatives have taken things to the next level. Tired from their exhausting schedule of… well, showing up, they now require recliners in the assembly lobby to rest after lunch. Because, of course, how can one possibly govern a state on a full stomach without a quick snooze?
Democracy on rent
Speaker U.T. Khader has assured taxpayers that the recliners won’t be bought but merely rented. A thoughtful touch, no doubt. At least these honourable legislators won’t have to carry their own pillows to work. What’s next? Live yoga sessions to help them de-stress? Aroma therapy to ease the trauma of listening to opposition members? A masseuse on standby in case raising their hand for a vote gets too strenuous?
Siesta for all
The real tragedy is that even these recliners may not serve their intended purpose. The Speaker himself admitted that MLAs tend to leave the Vidhana Soudha after lunch and simply not return. This isn’t just about naps – it’s about keeping them physically present so that the assembly doesn’t start looking like an abandoned movie theatre after intermission.
The Speaker had to introduce an AI-based attendance tracking system to ensure MLAs at least make an appearance. Imagine needing artificial intelligence to track natural laziness. If only this level of innovation was applied to governance!
But why stop at MLAs? If elected representatives need post-lunch recliners, surely their secretariat staff deserve an afternoon siesta, too. And what about the peons and clerks who actually keep the system running while their bosses snooze? Surely, wouldn’t their productivity skyrocket with a short nap? And, in the spirit of fairness, shouldn’t our MLAs extend this privilege to their domestic staff at home? Perhaps Karnataka’s budget should include provisions for household nap allowances – it’s only fair.
Why read when you can rest?
Ironically, the same Speaker who championed nap time is also organising a book fest at the Vidhana Soudha. One would think legislators would prioritise reading to sharpen their minds, but apparently, they would rather recline than refine. Maybe if MLAs spent more time reading and less time snoring, we wouldn’t need AI systems to remind them that they have a job.
But then again, why read when you can rest? Why debate when you can dream? Why govern when you can grab a pillow? The people of Karnataka may have elected leaders, but they ended up with well-rested emperors – reclining comfortably, while democracy struggles to stay awake.